This post is my afterthought or is the direct result of someone close to me recently reminding me that I was almost 50. Age has never really mattered me and I had never given it much thought until then. With an extremely busy work schedule, my struggle has been mostly focused on finding the work-life balance I so desperately seek. I check off every day and then every week and it seems like time just flies. My check list of “To Do” merges from one day to another and so it continues. So just like any other day, the birth day comes and goes and I keep playing catch up.

Well now I have been reminded that I am close to turning 50. I have been constantly told by people that I don’t look my age. I have been told I am too active for my age, to slow down, and to rest! I have been asked by many to stop running as I am going to destroy my knees and one person even told me that the orthopedic surgeon would love me because I would give him business when I needed knee replacements. The list of advice goes on and on.

Someone recently even asked me to act my age which stumped me.. what are the expectations from me? How is an “almost 50 year old” supposed to act? Is there an instructional manual on “What to expect when you are 50”?

But at the bottom of it, now that I have been reminded, I am proud of my age. I don’t hide it.. heck for a premie born at 33 weeks and barely 4 lbs, I have done fairly well for myself. I made an entry into this world almost two months early and I have survived and thrived.

I have heard the adage.. don’t ask a woman her age, well you can ask me mine. There is nothing to hide and what do I hide and which year? Each year has a special place in my heart. Can I hide the year when I had my first crush? Can I hide the year when I had my babies? Or should I hide the years when I obsessed over having a baby girl and went through heartbreaking miscarriages. I cannot possibly hide the year when I ran my first race or the years when I climbed Half-Dome or hiked down the Grand Canyon. Or all my travels and adventures… the years when I traveled to Guatemala or Turkey or Spain or may be Iceland? What year should I pick to hide?

There have been years with extreme highs and some years with deep lows. Each high or low is a reminder of who I am and my experiences and I am not ready to give them up. Where each high has filled me with happiness and joy, each low has torn me apart but made me stronger to withstand the storms. I can’t figure how to give up even one minute of these “almost 50” years.

So as I turn 50 soon, I am aspiring to be better and do better. I am willing to accept the grey’s, the wrinkles, the jiggles and all. If the glasses make me see better, then bring them on. I won’t be hiding my age but celebrating it because my Version 5.0 will be the best one yet. So here I am “almost 50” and proud of it and glad every minute shows.